


Lay Down Thy Head

by mercyfull



Category: Ghost (Sweden Band)
Genre: Big Sisters Breeze and Blizz, Creepy Dewdrop, Dad Ghoul Aether, Developing Friendships, Fluff, Gen, Happy Ending, Loneliness, Multi is Multi, Napping, Rain is baby, Secret Spots, Sneaking Around, Soft Boy Earth, Unbeta'd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-23
Updated: 2019-07-27
Packaged: 2020-07-12 09:36:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19944004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercyfull/pseuds/mercyfull
Summary: A freshly summoned ghoul searches for a spot to call his own.





	1. By the hearth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the "uwu newly summoned baby ghoul" shtick is overdone but I really needed to get this fic off my chest ;_; I have reached peak sappiness and it feels pretty damn good. Hope you enjoy!
> 
> Breeze = short ghoulette  
> Blizzard = tall ghoulette

*

“Uh, Blizz?”

“Yes Rain?”

Rain glances to the side and mulls over his next words. The two of them are seated on a mattress in the ghouls’ dorm room, the _den_ , facing each other and passing an intricately twisted string between their hands in a game of cat’s cradle. Rain is surprisingly good at it despite not having much practice — his long nimble fingers easily pick up the shapes and patterns, and soon he doesn’t need the ghoulette to guide him through the steps anymore.

They’re the only ones in the room. The other band ghouls all went their separate ways after the rehearsal ended, which Rain notices has become a regular occurrence on most days. It hasn’t always been this way. When they were first brought into service the band ghouls spent most of their time together, bonding and figuring out their new pack’s dynamics. Now, after the first leg of the tour ended and they were returned to the convent, it appears that the rest of the ghouls all suddenly developed a taste for privacy. Rain finds himself on his own unnervingly often. Something about being by himself after the bustle and hustle and excitement of rehearsal feels particularly lonely.

Usually Blizzard is gone as well, but today Rain trailed after her after the Cardinal had dismissed them for the day, and the two of them ended in the dorm by themselves, masks off, lounging around lazily and playing games to pass the time. Rain chews on his lip as Blizzard expertly disentangles the string from his fingers and coils it into a new shape around her own. He really hopes she doesn’t think his question is stupid. “Where does… where does everybody go after rehearsal?” 

Blizzard shrugs and motions for him to take his turn. “I don’t know. To nap in their spots, probably?”

“Nap…?” Rain looks around them in confusion. The ghouls all sleep in one room in a nest of mattresses and pillows that they gathered over time. Every evening Rain looks forward to crawling inside their sleep pile and tangling in it, and every morning he struggles to leave its warmth behind. He had never been part of a pack before and it’s probably his favorite thing about being a band ghoul so far. “But don’t we all sleep here?” he asks with uncertainty.

“Well, yeah,” Blizzard takes his stalling as a sign their game has ended and lets the string unravel from her fingers. “But after a long day of being cooped up in the rehearsal room with everyone, you want some time to yourself, don’t you?”

“Uh, no?” Rain is confused by that. The times he spends alone in the dorm feel miserable.

Blizzard reaches up and pats the top of his head. “It’s good to have our own private spots and be alone sometimes,” she says cheerfully. “It helps us calm down so we don’t fight as much.”

Rain accepts her touch but not her words, though he doesn’t say anything. He had spent more than enough time on his own throughout his life and he’s tired of it. Curling in on himself, he lies down on the mattress and rests his head in her lap. Blizzard coos and runs her fingers through his hair, gently working out the tangles and running her nails lightly over his scalp. Rain mewls in content and rubs his cheek on her plush thigh.

“Do you have a nap spot?” he asks, voice low as he becomes sleepy from her playing with his hair.

“Of course!” Blizzard giggles giddily. “It’s the best one in the entire church.”

“Can I see it?”

“No!” Her fingers leave his hair and she playfully smacks his cheek. It doesn’t hurt, but he flinches away and pouts anyway. “It’s a secret, dumbass!” Blizzard takes his face in her hands and brings it back to her lap, digits returning to smooth through the waves of his hair.

Rain whines but quickly relaxes under her touch. He’s pretty sure if he blinks for too long he’ll fall asleep right then and there. “Why is it a secret?”

“Because it is! That’s the whole point. It’s _your_ spot, no one else can have it. Unless you want them to.”

“You don’t want me in your nap spot...?” Rain asks in his most pitiful voice. Was that the reason that whenever he’d glue himself to one of the other ghouls after rehearsal they’d go to the den with him? Did none of them want to bring him for a nap at their spots? If he had a spot of his own, he’d invite all his band mates to it.

“Don’t act all cute with me,” Blizzard flicks his ear. “I didn't make the rules. I don’t know where any of the others’ spots are, and they don’t know where mine is. That’s just how it is.”

Rain sighs against her thigh. He is still new to life under the Clergy, and there are many things he doesn’t understand yet still must reluctantly abide by. He would have accepted this as another one of those unexplainable, arbitrary rules, but then the door opens unexpectedly and he loses his line of thought. Both him and Blizzard reach quickly for their masks, but they relax when they recognize Breeze as she enters the room.

“There you are, Blizz,” she lowers herself gracefully to the mattress beside them and makes herself comfortable, removing her mask and her shoes. Once her mass of curls is freed from her balaclava she shakes it out and Rain is reminded of a proud lion. “I was waiting for you.” 

“Sorry, Rainy here kept me busy,” Blizzard pats the ghoul’s head still resting in her lap.

Breeze laughs and reaches over to ruffle his hair. “Well, I can’t blame you.”

Rain relishes in the doubled attention. He enjoys spending time with the ghoulettes, even if sometimes it feels like they only have eyes for each other. "Were you in your secret nap spot?" he asks drowsily.

"Yes... why are you asking?" Breeze squints her eyes in mock suspicion then wags a finger in Blizzard’s face. “You haven’t told him where our nap spot is, have you?”

Blizzard starts to giggle, but her amusement dies down when Rain sits up abruptly and glares between them. " _Our_ nap spot?" he repeats to make sure.

Breeze seems confused at first, but when she catches Blizzard’s guilty eyes over Rain's shoulder an understanding expression blooms on her face. "Yes, Blizzard and mine's spot. We share it," she admits cautiously. 

"So it's not a secret!" Rain fixes Blizzard with an accusatory look. 

“It is, Rain!" Blizzard sounds exasperated. "But you can choose to share it with someone if you want!" 

"Then why won't you share it with me?" Rain is starting to feel exasperated, too. It seems so unfair that his band mates are spending time together, hiding away and sharing secrets, while he's left to stay on his own. Being in a pack was supposed to end his loneliness, not add to it and make it worse.

Breeze touches his shoulder and Rain tenses under her hand. "Rain, when you find your own secret spot you'll understand," she says gently. 

Beside them Blizzard nods in agreement. "Don't be mad," she leans close to him, trying to catch his gaze, but he keeps his eyes downcast. Instead, she takes his hand and holds it between hers. "Until you find your own place, we'll both spend time with you here in the den, if you want."

Rain tears his hand out of her hold, but when she pulls him into a hug he doesn't resist. He sighs in defeat and relaxes into her, already feeling his anger melt away. He's simply not the type to stay mad, even as the feeling of rejection settles heavily in his chest. Eventually he returns the hug, grateful for the ghoulettes' offer, but in his heart he has already decided — he is going to find his own spot, and he will share it with another ghoul. He won't be lonely again. 

*


	2. On the forest bed

*

Rain is determined to follow through with his decision. He’s not very proud of his method, but it’s the most effective one he can think of — he plans to sneak after one of his band mates, find their secret spot and share it. It’s invasive, maybe, but he has already made up his mind. If no one will bring him to their spot Rain will get there on his own. He refuses to be left behind.

As the rehearsal is closing on its end Rain considers his options. His first instinct is to follow Multi, but he still remembers the sting of rejection when the ghoulettes refused to allow him in their spot. He fears how much more it would hurt to be turned down by the ghoul he feels closest to. Rain glances toward the back of the room as he ponders on that and his eyes meet with Multi’s, who sends a blinding smile in his direction. Rain smiles back weakly. No, that would be too painful. Instead, he opts for a different target — their drummer Earth.

Earth leaves the rehearsal room at such a leisurely pace Rain barely even feels like he’s following him. He keeps a long safe distance between them, trying to seem inconspicuous as he walks in the same direction the other ghoul is headed in. Earth is easy to keep track of, no matter how far ahead he gets, he’s so tall that even when a group of Siblings end up stepping between them his head is clearly visible above the crowd.

Rain’s curiosity grows as he’s led through a backdoor and out to the yard behind the monastery. Earth keeps walking, across the grassy field and into the woods at the edge of it, further and further until he disappears in the thick of them. Rain picks up his pace and hurries after him. The temperature drops as he makes it deeper into the forest. It’s dark and cold, and for a few terrifying moments Rain feels lost, surrounded by trees in every direction, but then he hears a rustle a few feet ahead and he looks up in time to see a tall figure push through branches toward a sunnier area.

It’s a small clearing in the woods, Rain finds when he comes close enough. He stays at the edge of it and presses himself to a large tree trunk, peeking from around it as he keeps himself hidden from sight. Inside the clearing, Earth toes off his shoes and walks a few unhurried circles in the grass until he finds a soft patch with plenty of sun. The tall ghoul lowers himself to the ground with a sigh and stretches his long legs in front of him, toes twitching inside his colorful socks. Rain watches him and wonders when would be the best time to make his presence known, but the decision is made for him when the branch he’s holding snaps with a loud ‘crack’ and falls from his hands.

Earth jumps where he’s sat and turns toward the noise. “Rain,” he sighs at the sight of him and relaxes his shoulders into their usual droop. “You scared me.”

“Sorry, Earth,” Rain gives him a little wave and steps out from the trees. “I found your nap spot,” he says apologetically.

Earth lets out a deep breath and looks around himself, his hand coming up to touch the back of his mask. “I guess you did,” he shrugs, resigned. “It’s not much of a spot. Just a nice place outside.”

It is a nice place. They’re far enough from the monastery that they don’t hear its normal bustle and everyday noises, only the chirping of birds and the sound of the wind blowing through leaves. The opening in the woods above allows enough sunshine to filter through the treetops and grow soft grass on the ground. There are a few large rocks jutting out from the greenery, covered in moss and looking like they’d be comfortable to lean against. Rain sees how it can be a good place to escape to after rehearsal, especially on a sunny day such as today.

“Can I sit with you?” Rain asks.

The tall ghoul nods and pats the ground, and Rain bounces next to him and plops down by his side. They sit quietly for some time, enjoying the gentle breeze and the warm sun, until Earth reaches inside his pocket and takes his phone out.

“I normally just, uh, watch Netflix here and sleep ‘til dinner,” Earth taps the screen on with a large thumb and swipes between the apps. “The WiFi here isn’t great but it’s manageable.”

Rain looks at the phone longingly and hugs his knees to his chest. “I’m not allowed to have a phone anymore,” he murmurs against the fabric of his pants. “I kept breaking it.”

Earth scoots closer to him and opens his Netflix app, and Rain is happily surprised by the other ghoul’s willingness to share personal space. He kicks his own shoes off and runs his feet through the grass, his toes wiggling from out of his holey socks.

They watch a few minutes of one of the suggested movies, but as soon as the video stops to buffer Earth's hand drops and Rain turns to see him laid on his back, snoring softly. Rain lies down as well, crossing his arms and shutting his eyes against the sun. It’s peaceful and comfortable in the clearing, but no matter how hard he tries, he can't seem to fall asleep. He rips out a blade of grass and twirls it between his fingers, staring up at the trees above him.

It’s a couple hours (and a few dozen grass blades) later when Earth’s phone buzzes, jolting the tall ghoul awake and alerting them both that dinner will soon be served. Earth had moved close to Rain in his sleep, snuggling against his side, and now that he’s awake he rolls away with an embarrassed laugh. They get up and put their shoes on, then make their way back to the monastery in comfortable silence. The walk through the woods seems much shorter to Rain with Earth close by, leading the way.

They’re about halfway through the backyard when Earth suddenly stops. Rain bumps into him softly.

“Um, Rainy…”

Rain perks up at the pet name he’s not used to hearing from his quiet and stoic band mate. He waits patiently as Earth searches for his words.

“I don’t mind that you found my spot,” Earth says eventually. “And you can use it if you want, it’s just that…” he trails off, lips tightening and jaw working as he thinks of what to say. Rain doesn’t pressure him. He knows Earth is not a ghoul of many words. After a few moments of silent contemplation Earth finally opens his mouth and lets out a deep sigh. “I’m sorry, I don’t want to sound mean,” his shoulders draw up to his ears as he shrinks into himself in anxiousness. “But I like my spot, and… you should have one of your own.”

“It’s fine,” Rain hurries to assure him when he notices how guilty Earth seems to be feeling. If there is one ghoul among their pack Rain knows values peace and quiet, it’s their drummer. Going after his spot was probably not the best idea. “I’m not sure it’s the right place for me, anyway,” he admits as his eyes fall to the ground beneath his feet. “It’s great but I think it fits you better.”

Earth places a hand on Rain’s shoulder and squeezes it gently until he looks up again, meeting the taller ghoul’s eyes. “You can still visit if you want. Just not, uh, all the time, you know?” Earth sounds genuine, and Rain smiles in gratitude and pats the hand on his shoulder. Both feeling calmer, the two return to the monastery, ready to meet with the rest of the band before dinner.

*


	3. Amid the soft hay

*

The next day Rain sets his sights on Aether. He still feels bad for invading Earth’s private spot - the one place their introverted drummer gets to recharge and be on his own - but he has a feeling the highly sociable Aether would be more inclined to share space with another ghoul.

After the Cardinal dismisses them Rain takes longer than usual to put his bass away. He discreetly watches Aether from the corner of his eye. The sturdily built ghoul doesn’t seem to be in a hurry to leave — he helps the ghoulettes wrap their keyboards with a sheet then stands and talks to the Cardinal for long minutes. At this point the three of them are the only ones left in the rehearsal room and Rain worries he’ll raise their suspicions if he stays any longer. He exits the room and lingers in the hall outside, hidden in an alcove, pretending to mess with his spats or look for something on the floor whenever someone passes by.

At last, Aether and the Cardinal leave the room, the ghoul bowing his head respectfully as his master parts from him with a nod. Rain glues himself to the wall when the Cardinal walks past him and tries to not be seen. The thought of the white eye boring into him in an unblinking stare makes him shiver. Cardinal Copia has been kind to him so far, but Rain can’t help but still be wary of the human clergy…

Thankfully the Cardinal doesn’t seem to notice him, and once he passes by, Rain peeks around the alcove and sees Aether disappear down the hall in the opposite direction. Rain rushes to follow, worried he will lose Aether, but just as he's about to take the turn he hears conversation and stops still before he reveals himself to the talking pair. One is Aether and the other is an unfamiliar female voice, probably some Sister of Sin. Listening carefully, Rain waits for them to finish their discussion (something about help with the coming Sunday's mass) and for Aether to advance some before he takes the turn and silently stalks behind his band mate.

Very soon Rain realizes that there is no fear of him losing Aether. It feels like every soul in the church has something to discuss with him. Aether gets stopped every step of the way and indulges everyone, allowing them to engage him in conversation, and Rain grows impatient. It’s hard to be sneaky when you spend most of the sneaking just dawdling in one place. Lucky for him, despite his reputation of being clumsy and breaking most things he gets his hands on, Rain can be incredibly stealthy when he wants to.

It feels like hours later when they finally reach a quieter area of the monastery where there is no one to require Aether’s attention. Rain recognizes that they’re down by the kitchens. He’d been there a few times on his nightly roams, and he knows that the doors along the narrow, dark corridor lead to pantries and small storage rooms, and that all of them are kept locked. Rain crouches in a shadowed area and watches as Aether glances behind himself before producing a set of keys from his jacket and unlocking one of the doors.

It's time for Rain to announce his presence, unless he wants to find himself locked outside. He stands up and steps out of the shadows, letting his shoes clack on the floor tiles as he walks. Aether practically leaps in surprise and slams the door shut again. 

“Satan’s ballsack, Rain! Where did you come from?!”

“Sorry,” Rain looks down in shame. He didn’t mean to scare Aether that badly.

“Don’t sneak up on people like that,” Aether points accusingly at him, but his tone softens when he senses Rain’s guilt. “I nearly pissed myself. What are you doing down here?”

Rain shuffles his feet where he’s standing and looks at the door Aether is standing in front of. “Is this your spot?” he asks.

“Uhh…” Aether looks between the door and Rain, his hand tightening around the keys in his hand.

“Can I go in?” Rain tilts his head, voice hopeful. “Everybody has their spot but me and I feel so alone…”

Aether’s dark eyes study him from the holes of his mask, and Rain fears he’s about to be sent away, but then the other ghoul brings his hand back to the doorknob and twists it open with a sigh. “Alright,” he nods, and his lips stretch into a smile when he notices the excited look in Rain’s eyes. “Just don’t tell anyone about it, yeah? If Dewdrop finds out I’ll never have a moment to myself ever again.”

“I promise,” Rain slips inside before Aether has a chance to regret his decision. He finds himself in a tiny storage room filled with heavy looking sacks, big enough that Rain’s thin frame could easily fit in one of them. Aether enters after him and locks the door behind himself, and for a short moment everything turns pitch black, but before Rain’s ghoul sight can kick into action Aether flips a switch and the room is bathed in a low, sallow light from the single light bulb hanging above. Something feels strange to Rain but he can’t say what it is, only that his skin feels tingly and his nose itches behind his mask.

Aether crosses the short distance to the opposite end of the room where several sacks are piled together and pushed against the wall. There’s a noticeable dip in the pile - an Aether shaped dip - and right next to it there are several snack and candy boxes, arranged neatly on the floor.

“Touch the wall,” Aether beckons to him with one hand as he places the other on the stone. Rain does as instructed and feels warmth under his palm. “There are ovens on the other side,” Aether explains with a smile. “I like to lay down here with my back against the wall. This is the best nap spot you could wish for.”

It feels really nice, but Rain can’t keep his hand on the wall for long. The tingling on his skin is becoming difficult to ignore and he digs his nails into the backs of his hands as he tries to alleviate the itch. When he looks down and sees the skin of his hands is red and blotchy he lets out a distressed sound and scratches harder.

“Rain?” Aether looks at him in concern. “What’s wrong?”

“I don’t…” Rain whimpers and pushes his fingers under the neck of his balaclava, scratching desperately. Every inch of his skin feels like it’s on fire. Aether puts a hand on his back and Rain shakes it off, uncomfortable with the touch. He had never experienced anything like this before and he's helpless to how he can make it stop. Aether grabs him again, firmly this time, and Rain is too distracted to resist being bodily dragged out of the room and back to the corridor.

Aether sits him on the ground and removes his mask and balaclava, then squats beside him, using his wide frame to shield Rain from wandering eyes should anyone pass by. It takes a few moments but finally the itch eases and Rain lets out a long, relieved breath. He presses his palms gently to the sides of his neck, trying to soothe the skin he had almost scratched raw moments ago.

“Has this ever happened to you before?” Aether’s eyes follow Rain’s hands, studying the red scratch marks slowly begin to fade.

Rain shakes his head no. Aether takes one of his hands in his own and turns it over, feeling the raised skin. “It’s like some kind of rash,” he says, brow furrowing behind his mask. “Rain, you’re still being picky with your food, right?”

Rain pulls his hand out of Aether's hold and shrinks in embarrassment. He's still suspicious of humans and their food, so during meals he sticks to things he's familiar with, like fruits and vegetables and unprocessed meat. His bandmates did notice this and kept trying to convince him to vary his diet, but it’s hard to get over the survival instinct preventing him from putting strange things in his mouth. The dessert table is the one place he's willing to get adventurous at, ever since the ghoulettes introduced him to the wonders that are chocolate and sugar.

“I promise I'll try new things…” he whispers, eyes downcast.

“No, no, turns out you did right avoiding that,” Aether hands him his mask back and lets himself drop from his squat to a sitting position, grunting when his backside lands on the floor. “They keep grains in those sacks. Rye, and oat maybe? I suppose you're allergic to that.”

Rain fixes his balaclava and mask back on and looks at Aether in question. “Allergic?”

“You know,” the ghoul waves his hands in the air as he thinks of an easy explanation. “Like, if you touch it, it makes you sick? I imagine if you ate it it would have been even worse.”

Curling into himself, Rain draws his knees up and raises his hands again to rub at his neck. “These human disguises are weird.”

“Yeah, well,” Aether climbs to his feet and offers Rain a hand which he accepts gratefully, letting the bulky ghoul pull him up to a standing position with ease. “We only got the ones, so better look after them,” Aether squeezes his hand and turns to lock the door to the small storage room.

Rain watches him with a miserable look in his eyes. “Does that mean I can’t use your spot?” he asks, shoulders slumping. Aether turns back to him and wraps an arm around him in a consoling hug, then starts to lead them back to the higher levels of the monastery.

“Well, you know where it is, and you’re always welcome there, but for your own good I think you shouldn’t,” Aether pats his back where he has an arm around him. “Come on, let’s go nap in the den.”

*


	4. Down caverns deep

*

Despite the obstacles he’d been faced with, Rain isn’t ready to give up yet. His next target is Dewdrop, who turns out to be incredibly challenging to follow. Their lead guitarist makes himself scarce as soon as rehearsal ends, and the first day Rain doesn't even have time to put his bass away before Dewdrop is gone. The second day he’s more prepared and follows him out of the room, but Dewdrop is small and fast and Rain loses him in the halls. It's only on the third day of his hunt for Dewdrop's spot that he finally manages to keep up with him long enough to realize where he’s headed.

The monastery had been built on top of the remains of an ancient castle, and underneath it there are miles and miles of abandoned tunnels and forgotten chambers. 'The dungeons', everybody called them. Rain had gone exploring there a couple of times, on nights he felt particularly brave, and found nothing but dust and spiderwebs and a chilling dampness. Is this really the place Dewdrop goes to to relax on his own? Rain shivers and hugs himself as he watches the ghoul descend deeper underground and waits for his chance to follow.

They’re walking the length of a dark corridor, Dewdrop far ahead and Rain stalking behind, hidden by shadows, when all of a sudden the small ghoul is nowhere to be seen. Rain stops in his tracks and looks around in confusion. Dewdrop disappeared in the blink of an eye.

Rain continues for a few more steps, silent and alert, and peers into a chamber, craning his neck around the rotted wooden door hanging from its hinges. It’s even darker inside than it is in the corridor, and Rain gives his eyes a moment to adjust before he slips inside, careful not to touch the door for fear of it falling apart.

He regrets going in almost immediately. It appears to have been a torture room at some point — there are chains and shackles hanging from the low ceiling, and in one of the corners sits what looks like a rusty iron maiden with its doors removed. There are other pieces of furniture in the chamber, but they’ve been broken and torn into so many pieces that it’s hard to tell what they used to be. Rain shudders as he looks around. There’s no sign of Dewdrop anywhere so he turns back, anxious to leave, but a figure at the door is blocking his path.

Rain would have screamed if his throat didn’t close up. All he manages is to squawk in fear. He trips over his own feet and tumbles to the ground, knees scraping on the cold stone as he scrambles to get away. Something grabs the tails of his coat and drags him back, and a familiar voice sounds angrily from behind him. “Why are you following me?!”

Sighing in relief, Rain relaxes and lets his forehead touch the cold floor. His heartbeat hammers in his head and he forces himself to breathe deeply. Briefly, he thinks back to Earth and Aether’s reactions when he sneaked up on them. Dewdrop just gave him a taste of his own medicine.

“Dewdrop,” Rain sits up slowly and turns to face him. The ghoul is standing above him menacingly, shoulders drawn up in a sharp angry line. “Is this… is this your spot?”

“That's what you're doing?” Dewdrop barks. “Trying to steal other ghouls’ spots?” 

“No!” Rain clambers to his feet. He's considerably taller than Dewdrop, but he often feels small when faced with his domineering nature. “I don't want to steal it,” he shakes his head, desperate for Dewdrop to understand. “It’s just… Everybody’s always gone after rehearsal, and I hate being left alone. I thought I could join someone else in their spot…”

Dewdrop huffs and stares at him, the eye holes of his mask appearing black in the darkness. A few tense moments later he lets his head fall back in exasperation. “Fine,” he sighs and moves back from the doorway, clearing Rain’s path. “Let’s go.”

Rain blinks in confusion. “Go where?”

“You wanna see where I go after rehearsal or not?”

“It’s not here…?”

Grabbing Rain’s wrist impatiently, Dewdrop pulls him out of the room and drags him back in the direction they came from. “I knew you were following me, you idiot,” he shoots Rain a glare over his shoulder. “I brought you down here to fuck with you.”

“Oh,” Rain looks at where the other ghoul is holding his hand as he's being lead out of the dungeons. He should have realized how suspicious it was of Dewdrop to suddenly become so easy to follow, after being frustratingly elusive the previous days.

They go back the exact same way they came, and when they end up outside the rehearsal room Dewdrop lets go of him and crouches by the door. Rain watches with a raised brow as the ghoul tinkers with the lock. The door clicks open and Dewdrop slinks inside, motioning for Rain to follow.

“Why did we return here?” Rain asks once the door closes behind him. The rehearsal room looks the same as it did when they left it some moments ago. The guitars are put aside in their places and the keyboards and drum set are covered against dust. It’s a soundproof room, windowless and not very big, and Rain is filled with a sense of welcome familiarity as he steps inside, though it feels strange seeing it empty of his band mates.

Dewdrop doesn’t answer and instead walks toward the guitar rack and takes Aether’s black Fantomen gently by the neck. He brings it with him to one of the large amplifiers in the room and gets on top of it with a graceful hop, ending up seated with the guitar in his lap and his legs dangling over the side of the amp. He strums a few notes, testing the sound, then settles his fingers on the pegs and gets to work tuning.

Long moments pass before Dewdrop finally breaks the silence. “I wait for everyone to leave then come back here,” he says, eyes lowered to the strings. “I guess I don’t have a proper nap spot, either.”

Strangely Rain feels like he’s trespassing. He doesn’t dare to move closer to Dewdrop, so he chooses to sit on a chair pushed against the wall and watch him from the side. “What do you do here?” Rain asks. He speaks as quietly as he can and still it feels like his voice intrudes on the air in the room. His eyes follow Dewdrop’s fingers with fascination.

Dewdrop shrugs, still busy tuning the guitar. “Practice, take care of the instruments,” he throws a quick glance around the room, ”clean the keys, oil the drum parts. You know, maintenance shit.”

Rain remembers suddenly how rarely he’s had to tune his bass, and how he never even had to replace the strings. He had wondered about it once or twice, surprised by the instrument’s resilience, but just assumed the guitar the Clergy issued him was of a higher quality than what he was used to. Now he realizes Dewdrop had been taking care of it for him and keeping it in perfect condition.

“You can nap here if you want,” Dewdrop looks at him, hands moving on the strings on their own, strumming a slow melody. “I’m not going to plug anything in, it shouldn’t get too loud.”

“What about you? You don’t nap?”

Scoffing, Dewdrop plucks one string a little too hard, as if to emphasize his aversion to the idea. “Waste of time,” his finger smooths along the string, like it was soothing it, and he returns to playing. “Besides, if I need to calm down I just go to the dungeons and let off steam there.” He says the last sentence with a sideways look at Rain and a small smirk, and Rain thinks back on the underground room full of mangled furniture and the iron maiden with its doors ripped off. He's thankful that his mask hides his horrified yet impressed expression.

He doesn’t mean to, but Rain does doze off eventually, curled up on the chair with his head resting on his knees. It’s hard not to, with the soft sounds of Dewdrop working the guitars then testing the tuning by playing an airy melody, something soft and calming that Rain doesn't recognize. He takes care of Aether's, then Rain's, Multi’s too, and anything beyond that Rain doesn't remember as he had already drifted off.

It's a while later when a hand shakes him awake, a little too harshly. Rain rubs his eyes through the holes in his mask and looks up sleepily at Dewdrop.

“Come on,” Dewdrop turns and starts walking toward the door. “It's almost dinnertime.”

Rain stands up and stretches, his muscles feeling stiff after falling asleep on the chair. As he turns his neck from side to side he notices that everything in the room has been returned to its place. In fact, it looks even neater than it did after the rehearsal ended — Rain is pretty sure there were a few strings packs laying around earlier, but now everything has been put away.

Before they exit the room Dewdrop sticks his head out to make sure their path is clear. “The lock's all fucked, don't tell Copia or he'll have it replaced,” the small ghoul mutters as he pushes the door closed once they're both outside. It makes a clicking sound, signaling that the latch had slipped back into place. “I'll show you how to get it open next time,” Dewdrop tells him as they start to make their way to the dining hall.

Rain puts his hand on Dewdrop's shoulder to stop him. “Thank you, Dew,” he says sincerely. “I'm not… I'm not sure I'll come to your spot again."

“It's not my spot, it's just the rehearsal room,” Dewdrop rolls his eyes at him, impatient. “It's not mine any more than it's yours.”

“Yeah, I know that, but…” Rain chews on his lip as he tries to put his thoughts into words. He thinks he understands it now. It seems obvious to him — it might not be a secret, private spot like the rest of them, but the rehearsal room is Dewdrop's spot nonetheless. He needs his time alone with the music, and no matter what he says, another presence will only serve as an interruption. An intrusion. 

“But?” Dewdrop repeats. His eyes narrow and he squints up at Rain in suspicion. There's a hint of hurt in his next words. “What, you're scared to be alone with me?”

Rain sputters and shakes his head no. It's true that he feels intimidated by the fiery lead guitarist, but now that he'd witnessed an unexpectedly soft and somewhat nurturing side of him, he sees him in a different light. Dewdrop wasn't vocal about it, but he truly cared about the band, perhaps more than any of them did. In an attempt to show his appreciation Rain throws his arms around Dewdrop and pulls him into a hesitant hug. They both tense up, but when Dewdrop doesn't push him away Rain takes it as approval to squeeze him closer. The hug is awkward and a bit uncomfortable, with Rain's arms wrapped around the smaller ghoul's head and Dewdrop's mask digging into his chest, but Rain still doesn't let go.

“I'm not scared,” Rain assures him quietly. “It's just that, I think… I think you need this spot more than I do.”

Dewdrop shoves away from him and glances around them as if to make sure no one saw their vulnerable moment. “Fine,” he avoids Rain's eyes but pats his back in a friendly manner. “Let's go eat, I'm fucking starving.”

*


	5. In my arms

*

So this was it.

Rain keeps his head down during rehearsal, letting his fingers play as he loses himself in his thoughts. He found Earth’s, Aether’s and Dewdrop’s spots and while all of them had been welcoming, each in their own way, he does not feel like he can join any of them. He knows better than to go after the ghoulettes’. The only one left is Multi but Rain feels so dejected that he can’t imagine going through another disappointment. 

In the end Breeze was right. A ghoul’s secret spot was a private thing and could not be shared with just anyone who pops in the area, uninvited or not.

The Cardinal claps twice, sharply, and Rain wakes from his trance. For a second he worries he had messed up his playing but the Cardinal looks his ghouls over and dismisses them with a wave of a hand. Rehearsal is finished for the day. 

Rain stands by the guitar rack, patiently waiting for his turn to put his bass away. Dewdrop winks at him before he vanishes from the room, and when Aether passes by he gives him a friendly squeeze on the shoulder. Rain smiles to himself and straightens his posture. It’s not all so bad — the events of the previous days allowed him to get to know his band mates better. So he doesn’t have a spot, so what? He has made it this far without one. And he can go visit Dewdrop and Earth in theirs, or drag Aether or Breeze or Blizzard to spend time with him in the den— 

“Rainy,” Multi props his chin on his shoulder, interrupting his line of thought. “Heard you’ve been naughty lately.”

“What?” Rain’s eyes widen in shock.

Multi chuckles and circles Rain, coming to face him. “Sneaking around, following everyone, trying to steal their secret spots…” crossing his arms over his chest, Multi tilts his head in amusement. “I didn’t take you for that kind of ghoul.”

“I’m not—” Rain’s face grows hot under his mask. The accusations catch him by surprise and he flounders as he tries to come up with words in his defense. The way Multi put it… Rain is horrified to realize how questionable his actions sound. He wants to explain himself, but suddenly he’s too embarrassed to admit that he’d just been lonely and needed company. His fingers go lax as Multi takes the bass out of his hand.

“I’m kidding,” Multi places Rain’s guitar in the rack and turns back to face the silently panicking ghoul. When he notices Rain’s distress his tone turns soft and he steps closer. “Hey, nobody complained, if that’s what’s worrying you,” he smiles encouragingly as he rubs up and down Rain’s arms, his hands then coming to rest on his shoulders. “I’m just more observant than people give me credit for.”

Rain recovers enough to muster a reply. “I… didn’t take you for that kind of ghoul,” he says quietly, lips splitting into a small smile.

“Ha,” Multi snorts and squeezes his shoulders before letting go. “Anyway, I figured I should just show you my spot before you get a chance to invade it on your own.”

It’s a moment before the words sink in. Rain stares at Multi in surprise mixed with apprehension. “You don’t have to,” his brow furrows as he turns his gaze to the side. He had shamelessly played his band mates’ guilt, trying to get them to share their spots, and now it came back to bite him in the ass. Rain wasn’t looking for pity. All he wanted was to find a place where he wouldn’t feel like an intruder.

“I know I don’t have to,” Multi says as his eyes wander past Rain’s shoulder to acknowledge Aether waving at them from the door, signaling for them to leave so he can lock up behind them. He focuses back on Rain before him and motions with his head toward the exit. “And you don’t have to come, but I want you to.”

Rain's heart thunders in his chest as he follows Multi out of the room. They walk the halls quietly, Multi occasionally turning back to make sure Rain is still behind him, and the sound of their footsteps echoes loudly in Rain's ears.

Multi leads him to the top floor of the monastery. It’s not exactly deserted, but it’s also not a central part of the building that sees a lot of traffic. The walls are tall and the ceiling is far above them, giving room to one of the Church’s most precious possessions — a large stained glass window depicting a Hellish scene of torture. Two Sisters of Sin sit in one of the wall alcoves, conversing quietly, and when Multi notices them he swiftly turns on his heel and takes Rain by the hand, dragging him back in the direction they came from. They stop a few steps away and Multi releases him and gives him an apologetic smile. “We'll wait here until they leave,” he explains, crossing his arms and leaning back against the wall. “Man, these Siblings love to sit around and gossip, don't they?”

Rain discreetly rubs his hand where Multi had just held him. He feels anxiety start to form in the pit of his stomach. Multi has a terrible reputation of being a prankster, and Rain wonders if he’s truly being taken to a nap spot or if it's just another one of the mean jokes Multi is renowned for. Rain had never been on the receiving end of them, not yet at least, and he fears his time has come to become one of Multi’s victims. The thought makes his heart clench painfully.

“Did you find anything interesting?” Multi’s smooth voice pulls him out of his thoughts. Rain blinks at him in confusion.

Multi laughs at his expression. “I know Earth goes outside and Aether’s is somewhere in the lower levels. But I always wondered where the girls hide out, and Dew, too. Did you find out?”

“I don’t think I should say…” Rain whispers while nervously wringing his hands. The ball of anxiety coils tighter in his stomach.

“You really shouldn’t,” Multi shakes his head and laughs again. “I was just testing you, to make sure you won’t tell on me. You’re the first person I’m bringing to my spot.”

Rain feels a tinge of pride hearing that. He lets out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding and even finds it in himself to return Multi’s smile.

Behind them the Sisters get up and move to leave. Multi waits for them to walk out of sight, then springs to where they sat and pushes a piece of tapestry aside. Rain gasps in surprise when a narrow passage is revealed behind it. He watches Multi slip inside and lingers back in the hall, torn between suspicion and the desire to follow, but when Multi leans back out and beckons him with a finger Rain makes up his mind and goes after him.

He finds himself in some kind of tunnel in the wall, and when the tapestry slides closed behind them everything falls into darkness. The only source of light comes from somewhere high above. It’s too cramped for both of them and Rain thinks in panic that Multi really must be pranking him because there is no way that this is his spot, and the fear only grows as Multi pushes him deeper into the tunnel. They reach what appears to be a shaft going up and Multi takes Rain’s hand and guides it to the wall, leading Rain to touch what feels like a ladder carved into the stone. Rain gets the hint and climbs up quickly, curious and nervous to see where they will emerge, and when he reaches the opening at the top he pokes his head out and looks around.

They’re still in the same hallway at the top floor of the monastery, but now they’re higher up. Rain catches a glimpse of the two Sisters right before they disappear around a corner. Multi climbs after him and pinches his leg when he stops for too long, and Rain clambers all the way up to give him room to follow. They come out on a stone ledge right under the large stained glass window, and everything around them is bathed in the colorful light that filters through it. Multi points at a soft-looking pile of pillows and blankets, and when Rain turns to him he is struck by the sight of the red, yellow and purple shades that reflect on the chrome of his mask.

Multi grins at him. “What do you think?”

“It’s pretty,” Rain answers dazedly. “How did you find it?”

Multi lets himself fall back into the nest of pillows. He kicks off his shoes and stretches his entire body, then relaxes into a comfortable sprawl. “I told you I’m more observant than you know,” he says and pats the pillow next to him. “Come here.”

Rain looks warily between Multi and the edge of the ledge. It’s not dangerously narrow but Rain knows how prone he is to accidents. He worries the front of his jacket with his hands, too embarrassed to say anything, but it’s as if Multi senses his concern — he scoots closer to the edge, making room for Rain on the other side.

“You won’t fall, I’ll hold you,” Multi peers over the edge and snickers. “Honestly, when I first started coming up here I used to fall all the time. It’s not that bad.”

Rain looks down at his feet and starts to remove his shoes. He doesn’t say it, but he’s grateful for Multi’s words. He crawls in the narrow space between Multi and the glass window and lies down, stiff and awkward, but then Multi wraps his arms around him and hugs him to his side. Rain hugs him back instinctively, immediately drawn to the feeling of closeness. He buries his face in Multi’s neck, feeling sheepish and embarrassed, but if the other ghoul is put off by him he doesn’t show it.

“This is nice,” Multi yawns in his ear. “You know, I thought it was a good spot, but it always felt like something was missing. It feels perfect now, though, doesn’t it?”

Rain falls asleep before he can think of an answer.

*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end  
> ╰(ꈍ ᴗ ꈍ)ﾉ


End file.
